Annabelle 5/5

It’s the day of the circus and Laura is getting ready to make her dress delivery. Caroline takes a look at the finished product and declares it beautiful. I dunno, Michael Kors is going to take one look at that fabric and I’ll be surprised if he doesn’t call it “dowdy”. Ma takes a second look and notices that the skirt is basted. Laura! Nina is going to notice and tear you apart. Half-pint is getting “auf’d” tonight, I just know it. Laura assures her Ma that she’ll do the finishing work, but the grin on her face after Caroline leaves suggests otherwise.

There’s a knock on the door of Christie’s bachelorette pad. Laura has arrived with the dress. Christie takes the garment and inspects it. As she holds it up to her body, Christie reminds Laura that she was supposed to have made the delivery by five o’clock. The clock behind Miss Snootypants shows that it is 5:05, therefore she is only going to pay half. Laura is all “bitch, please,” and I have to agree. A five minute delay does not a breach of contract make, particularly a penalty of half the cost. Christie hands Laura some money, telling her it is all she is getting. Laura decides that she can’t accept any money saying that she shouldn’t have been late and that “it would be on my conscience.” Christie is okay with this arrangement, particularly if it has taught Laura a lesson. “My Pa says it’s good for people to learn a lesson once in a while.” As Laura leaves, she turns back and insincerely wishes Christie a wonderful time at the circus.

Nels is sitting on the side of his bed again, looking at his ringmaster notes as the sun sets on Walnut Grove. Harriet comes in and tells him he has five minutes to get ready. He half-heartedly says “yes, dear”, which does not amuse Harriet. She tells him he is going to need a lot more pep for tonight. When that doesn’t cheer her husband up, Mrs. Oleson then reminds him that once the show is over Annabelle and her blood-related past will be gone and no one in the town will be any the wiser. Even so, Annabelle is still Nels’ sister and he reminds his wife of that fact.

Circus time. The band plays as an elephant wearing a bowler hat leads the parade. You know, all of my circus experiences involving elephants also involve copious amounts of elephant poo. Is that really the best animal to lead the parade? We see Almanzo clapping away at the parade as a disinterested Christie tries to put the moves on him. Billy Barty, dressed as clown, gets all up in Grace Ingalls’ face and she instinctively freaks out. Yeah, Caroline will be spending the rest of her evening trying to calm that kid down. Nels comes out to start the show. All that preparation ahead of time didn’t seem to help as he has to read off the names of the events directly from a list.

As Nels attempts to introduce the first act, two clowns start running around. One clown is carrying a large bucket and is chasing the sad clown. Charles is narrating the action for the blind kids, telling them that the clown with the bucket is right in front of them with a bucket of water and is aiming for the sad clown standing in the second row. The bucket clown fires and confetti is thrown all over Roscoe. You know, aside from putting out a fire, I can’t think of a situation where it is ever appropriate to throw a bucket of water or confetti at a blind person. Roscoe doesn’t seem to mind, but the blind kid sitting next to him seems to agree with me as he sullenly wipes the confetti off his person. While some acrobats are performing, a third clown runs over to Christie and presents her with a flower. When she makes eye contact with the clown the flower keels over. Almanzo gets a kick out of this, but Christie just smiles with even more bemused interest than before. Nels returns to the tent and introduces a baby elephant. Grace is still freaking out while Adam and Mary are attempting to get a sense of the action. I wonder if it was in the stage directions that they should be facing in two completely different directions. This is not a blind friendly episode. Almanzo loves every minute of the elephant dance though his date looks like she wants to be anywhere else on the planet. After pointing out that circuses are more intended for children (“Manny” disagrees with that point), she hopes that they don’t have to stay for the whole thing. What other plans did you have in mind there, toots? The whole town is at the circus so nothing is open and sex hasn’t been invented yet. You’re at the only show in town, so you might as well enjoy it.

After the elephant leaves, the clowns return with another bucket. As the chase continues, Caroline asks the Garveys if they happen to know where Laura and Albert are. The clowns start running around Nels and he gets splashed with confetti as he tries to introduce the next act. Everyone gets a kick out of this except for the Raccoon who promptly starts freaking out again. Willie says he wished the bucket had water. Nellie doesn’t like the idea of seeing her father doused while Harriet doesn’t want to see his new suit ruined. “You people” Willie says (a phrase that, unless followed with “are fantastic”, usually will get you into trouble), “you don’t know what’s funny.” The strongman comes out with a barbell labeled “1000 pounds” and holds it above his head. Caroline tries to use the feat of strength to calm down Grace. I don’t she celebrates Festivus, but she could be like me and is only impressed if he can move a semi-truck with his teeth. He does some more tricks as Christie goes into a deeper catatonic state. As the crowd cheers, Billy Barty strikes the set, carrying a couple of the papier-mache weights out of the tent. The strongman chases him out as another clown, obviously a child, carries away the barbell. Somehow, Caroline recognizes the clown as Albert and tells the Garveys and the Olesons.

Manly looks over at his date and she is in her own private hell. He makes a face that seems to say “nuts to you” and goes back to enjoying the show. The confetti clowns are back once more and Charles narrates for the blind kids, adding that he bets it just has confetti again. Nellie is caught up in the drama as the chase ends right in front of Christie and Almanzo. The sad clown makes a taunting face behind Prissypants and the other clown fires. This time the bucket has water and Christie gets soaked. Mary, who is sitting next to Charles, asks what happened. Mary Ingalls sucks at listening to narration. Christie stands up and the bucket clown takes the opportunity to publicly pants her by pulling down the skirt. Christie stomps out of the tent, swinging her purse behind her. The clown laughs, kisses Almanzo, and runs over to Caroline to say “Hi, Ma,” then runs out. I guess Laura can cross all that stuff off her bucket list.

A high wire act does some stuff before Annabelle makes her debut. Nels introduces Annabelle and Company, an act that consists of Annabelle holding onto the high wire from below (her feet are still on the ground) and midgets grabbing her legs. I guess they are trying to hoist her up? I’m not sure of the full scope as we hear Harriet and the kids making more fat jokes. Nels watches as the team of clowns try to help with the hoisting. Harriet remarks on how thankful she is that no one knows that Annabelle is a relative. The act goes on for about thirty more seconds and then Annabelle leaves. Apparently that was the grand finale because the rest of the circus comes out for a curtain call.

Once the circus cast is assembled, Nels quiets everyone down and thanks the show on behalf of Walnut Grove. He thanks them for the thrills and laughter and remarks that it is a wonderful thing to do for people. Nels then goes on to say that he is proud that one of the people in the circus is someone close to his heart. He introduces his sister Annabelle to the crowd. The crowd continues its standing ovation, though Harriet has to sit down as she is horrified that Nels revealed that tidbit. Annabelle joins her brother center stage and they hug.

Annabelle 4/5

Laura sulks her way back to the big top where Albert is moving around bales of hay. The sad clown has also arrived and taken a seat in the back corner of the tent. Laura returns the ticket to Albert and he asks what happened. Laura tells him that Almanzo is going to the circus with Christie, who Albert calls “Miss Snootypants”. I think Laura has a different name for her, but she is too polite to say it. Albert consoles his sister by saying that Almanzo is too old for her. Thank you! I’m glad somebody in town has finally said it. Laura denies this, pointing out that in all the famous marriages the man is much older than the woman. Let’s see, the first example that jumps to my mind would be Romeo and Juliet. Is that what you want, Half-Pint? Albert brings up Ma and Pa as a counterexample, but Laura declares them “not famous”. I guess that internship at Us Weekly is finally starting to pay off for Laura. Albert tries one more time to tell her to forget about Almanzo, but Laura doesn’t respond one way or another.

Instead, Laura walks over to where the sad clown is sitting and joins in the sulkfest. She confides that she is as sad as the clown is, or at least looks. The clown sighs, either as part of his shtick or because he knows he is going to be the unwilling audience of a “woe is me” monologue. After he flicks a pretend tear away, Laura tells him that the two of them are a lot alike because neither can effectively communicate their sadness. She then goes on to give the whole sordid history of her unrequited love of Almanzo. At least she acknowledges that she is a little young now but she is scared that he is going to find someone else before she reaches the age of consent. The clown kisses Laura’s hand and says “que sera sera.” Oh jeez, it’s London. Laura is completely surprised and asks if the others know. I guess she hasn’t seen the living quarters yet because the only privacy that any of the performers have is a bunch of ugly blankets hanging on a clothesline acting as a wall. Laura starts to freak out a bit, not because of the sad clown “Crying Game”, but because she doesn’t want anyone to know what she just told him. He promises discretion, so long as she doesn’t spoil his secret. He goes on to offer her the opportunity to be a guest clown in the circus. This intrigues Laura and she asks if anyone would know it was her. London asks if she had any clue he was the sad clown before the reveal. “Not until now,” says Albert off screen. Laura asks how long he has been there. Uh, the whole time, you were talking with him about ten feet away no more than five minutes ago. Albert asks if he can be a clown too and London agrees.

That night in the Oleson parlor, Harriet is putting the finishing touches on Nels’ ringmaster uniform. Nellie and Willie are watching from the sidelines, eating candy and telling their Pa that he look really important. Nels admits he doesn’t feel that way, but Harriet shushes him. She loves the idea that the circus sponsor gets the ringmaster gig. Nels thinks that London should do the job, believing that the ringmaster should be loud and funny. Harriet assures her husband that he can be loud and that he did say something funny once. Again, it is almost a sweet moment those two are having before Harriet spoils it by suggesting a run of jokes about the fat lady. I’m a little curious what happened in Harriet’s past that has made her such a Fat Nazi. We can see Nels internally counting to ten as Harriet makes quip after obnoxious quip, but then the kids get in on the action. Willie makes the suggestion that when the elephant comes in Nels should say he thought it was Annabelle in a gray dress. This cracks up the women, but Nels loses his temper, takes off his coat, throws it on the floor and says “That fat lady is my sister!” Harriet laughs it off, probably because she didn’t listen to what he just said. Nels grabs Harriet by the wrists, looks her in the eyes and emphatically says “she is my sister.” Dramatic music plays as Nels storms out the front door.

Nels has made his way to the big top looking for Annabelle. He doesn’t spot her right away, but Annabelle calls out asking if he is looking for her. Nels comes back into the tent as his sister walks in. Annabelle is working on a needlepoint project as she tells her estranged brother that she won’t tell anyone in town about their relationship. Nels says she doesn’t have to be secretive, but Annabelle isn’t interested. She reminds him of when they were kids and he would leave for school so early that he would have to wait outside in the cold just so that he didn’t have to walk with her. Annabelle knew what was what even back then and accepted his behavior, both then and now. Nels starts to make an excuse, but stops himself and acknowledges that he was about to make up something to finish his sentence. Annabelle goes on to explain that she was put on this planet for a purpose, “not an exulted purposed”, but a purpose. Nels asks for forgiveness, but his sister is not interested. He apologizes for driving her away, but Annabelle says she has a new family now that she has always been happy with. London calls for Annabelle and she takes her leave. Before she leaves, she takes one look at her brother and comments on how skinny he still is. Nels slowly and sadly departs.

Annabelle 3/5

Awkwardness is approaching the school for the blind as Nels rides up to make his delivery and Annabelle is in the classroom. She is telling the kids about her coworkers, including the dog trainer, offering to let the kids pet the dogs after the show. The kids like this idea. Annabelle has been speaking to the class for a while, so she asks them what they think she does in the circus. All the kids start shouting out ideas before Hester-Sue tells them to go one at a time. One girl, Susan, guesses that she is the showgirl who rides the elephant’s trunk. Annabelle cracks up at this idea, though the only other person in the room who knows what’s going on is Hester-Sue who doesn’t seem all that interested. Roscoe is next to guess and he goes with the magician’s assistant who gets cut in half. Annabelle decides to give them a hint, telling them she is in the sideshow. This clicks with Roscoe, who immediately guesses Bearded Lady. Everyone laughs at this answer, causing Roscoe to get defensive. Annabelle says that there are bearded ladies, she just isn’t one of them. The class gives up, so she tells them that she is the fat lady. They don’t believe her. To prove it she invites the blind children to come up and walk around her as they touch her and listen to her voice so they can experience “what a fat lady really feels like.” Words can’t describe the level of inappropriateness that is on the screen right now. As the children circle and grope, she makes a joke about how she doesn’t want to be tickled in any hemisphere. At this moment, she notices Nels standing in the doorway and no one is quite sure what to say. You know, even if he approved of his sister’s choice of livelihood, I think it is totally reasonable to be concerned about letting a bunch of kids feel you up, even if it is voluntary. He and Hester-Sue walk out of the classroom to complete the supply delivery. Once the delivery is complete, Nels hightails it out of there as Annabelle watches from the window.

That evening at the homestead, Laura is working on a dress as Charles reads by the fireplace. Laura notices that Pa has nodded off, so she walks over to close his book and put it away. This wakes him up and claims that too much of Caroline’s cooking is what put him to sleep. Caroline only heard the “cooking” part of his statement and checks to see what he said as she joins the family in the main room. As Laura returns to her project, Ma compliments the design so far. Laura thanks her, but says she wishes this project was for someone a little nicer. Is it a prom dress for Hedda Lettuce’s mom? No, it’s for Christie Norton, an apparent little Miss Perfect. “I bet she doesn’t even sweat,” Laura snarks. Pa gets a chuckle out of this, but Ma chastises Laura saying “when people pay us to do a job we don’t talk about them behind their backs.” I’m guessing Caroline hasn’t had much job experience in the world of customer service. Even my boss, one of the nicest customer service oriented people you will ever meet, has called someone an idiot immediately after an overly elaborate phone conversation.

Albert comes down from the loft as this is happening and announces that he finished his homework. He also announces that he is going to bed because he’s “pooped”. Caroline sputters at this word choice and tells Albert that he is “tired”. I think Caroline’s cooking has made her a bit uppity this evening. Albert says “good night” to his parents and starts to head back upstairs. On his way, he asks Laura if she would like his circus ticket so she can go with Almanzo. Caroline gives Laura a knowing glance while Laura gives Albert a “Dude! Keep that on the DL!” glance. Laura tries to play the “Boys? Ew!” card, but it doesn’t seem to work. Albert goes up to bed and you can sort of tell that Laura knows that she may have fumbled a bit in the politics of puppy love. Ma knows what’s up and tells her daughter that Albert was just trying to be nice. Laura acknowledges this and heads up to the loft to apologize. Albert is surprisingly steamed about what just happened and tells his sister that she should have just said she didn’t want the ticket. Of course, Laura actually wants the ticket she just couldn’t say so in front of Pa. What’s funny is they are having this conversation in their normal tones of voice at the top of the loft ladder. You know, the ladder that Pa’s chair is at the base of where he is currently sitting. Pa doesn’t say anything when Laura returns from the loft, though I wonder if he did after Albert calls down from the loft that she should ask Almanzo first thing in the morning.

Morning arrives and Laura has run down to the mill and notices Almanzo across the way at the Feed and Seed. Before going to see him, she rehearses what she is going to say. The scene is a little difficult to watch because things have not changed in 130 years in terms of how much you can beat yourself up over what you want to say to your crush. In the course of her rehearsals she comes up with four or five different strategies, but immediately discounts each one. She eventually decides on the one that I find most effective: Fight or Flight. She slaps herself in the face, tells herself to “just do it” and runs over to Almanzo. He is loading a wagon and notices “Beth” standing by the side of the building. He asks if he could interest her in a sack of grain, but the way he postures and says it makes him come off a bit smarmy. Laura uses his question as a cue to ask if she could interest him in going to the circus with her. Atta girl. Unfortunately, he already has a date for the circus. I don’t know if the smarminess is intentional, but it is extremely palpable. And creepy, given how there appears to be at least a twelve year difference between the two of them. Laura tries to play it off, but before it can turn into the pity party of near-tears and near-vomiting (if you’ve been in this situation you know what I’m talking about) a woman calls out for Almanzo. Oh, it’s Christie Norton, how ironic. Amazingly the show managed to create a character even prissier than Nellie. She asks Laura about the dress and admonishes her for not stopping by to reassure her about the delivery time of five o’clock. As Laura leaves, we can overhear Christie say to Almanzo “I hope that child finishes my dress on time; I do so want to look lovely for you.” How did she end up in Walnut Grove? She might as well have a British accent. Laura walks away defeated.

Annabelle 2/5

That night, Billy Barty and the rest of the sideshow are standing around the living quarters looking concerned. London sees the gathered crowd and asks what’s up. Billy Barty says that they are worried about Annabelle, who seems to be down in the dumps. Oh good, Annabelle is the fat lady so I can start calling her by name. Anyway, London steps into her cubicle to check on her. She puts her book down and invites everyone in so they can all chat. She asks why everyone looks down, and Billy Barty says “We’re sad because you’re sad.” Aww, how sweet, I knew that whole “one of us” thing was taken out of context. Back to Annabelle, she let’s her coworkers know that Nels is her brother. Ouch, I’m sorry she has such an awful niece, nephew and sister-in-law. Of course, she doesn’t know that yet since he didn’t know she joined the circus and she didn’t know he was a businessman. The editing keeps switching from Annabelle to Billy Barty who is either reacting to what she is saying or considering his grocery list. She recounts what happened at lunch and that all she wants is a little love or recognition from her brother. “I would have walked right over to him and given him one of my extra special patented bear hugs,” she says before she smothers Billy Barty in her arms. But since Nels failed to do that, Annabelle concludes that Nels must still be ashamed of his sister and her “bulk”. I think it should probably be noted that although Annabelle may be quite large by 1879 standards, she has what I would describe as a 2009 midwestern female build. In other words, she would be out of a job nowadays unless she put on ten or fifteen hundred pounds.

Billy Barty asks what’s wrong with how any of the freaks look, but London says it is the outsiders who are making those judgments with their “crazy notions”. True, but you all are trying to capitalize on those notions, so are there any victims here? Billy Barty stands by his indignation, saying that when Nels looked away from his sister he looked away from the entire circus and they should skip town. London shoots down Norma Rae’s idea, saying they have a contract with the town. Billy Barty tells Annabelle that the whole circus is her family and there’s a group hug moment. Aww. Annabelle picks up her book and resumes reading. Somber music plays as

Now we’re outside the boarding house. Nice edit there, show: I wasn’t finished. Anyway, Willie is hanging signs around town advertising the circus. Harriet comes outside and he asks her opinion of the ad. She compliments her “little pumpkin seed”, gives him a kiss, and tells him to plaster the town with posters. He asks if he should put them on the outhouses, which offends Harriet at first until he explains that everyone will see the posters there. If you want to be really effective, put the posters on the inside of the door – what else will people look at in there? Willie runs off as Harriet walks over to the Mercantile. Nels is sweeping the porch as his wife begins to prattle on about how much she loves seeing “Oleson’s Mercantile” on the posters. “Nothing warms the cockles of my heart like a good steady flow of cash.” Lovely. Nels isn’t in the mood and starts to head inside. Harriet stops him and asks him to deliver a banner to the big top. He says he has to make a delivery to the school for the blind and it has to be done right now. Harriet has caught on that Nels has been deflecting everything circus related since they arrived in town and he has been acting so “queerly”. Really, honey? Before he can respond, she decides to take the banner over herself. As she walks down the porch steps, she starts laughing at a “wonderful idea” she just had. She suggests hanging the banner on the backside of the fat lady. For a moment it looks like Nels contemplates shoving his wife off the porch, but she walks away before he has time to act.

London compliments Harriet’s banner as she finishes hanging it on the big top. Charles wanders over and notices that setup is moving along quite nicely. London mentions that the Ingalls kids are doing great work along with all the children. Charles also compliments Harriet and her sign before asking London for a favor. He asks if any of the performers would be interested in visiting the school for the blind and London suggests Annabelle. He sends Charles to the performers’ living area then starts to check how setup is going. As London passes Laura, she asks where the sad clown has run off to since she hasn’t seen him all day. London tells her that he usually wanders off during the day and sometimes doesn’t see anyone. Laura throws a pity party in the sad clown’s honor as London tells her he has never heard him speak and only once heard the clown clear his throat. Obviously tired of the line of questioning, London reminds Laura that if she is here to help, she should get back to work. She heads off to her next task.

Annabelle 1/5

A pied piper is leading the children of Walnut Grove through a field. Oh dear, what sort of grim fairy tale is about to unfold here? Did Mrs. Oleson refuse to pay someone for rat removal? Oh, Billy Barty is in this episode. That must mean the circus is in town. Hey! It’s Ken Berry! You see, I think Ken Berry would probably be a nice guy in real life, but he has made some really bad career decisions. Aside from Mama’s Family, he was also in that stupid backdoor pilot episode of the Brady Bunch with the couple that adopts a dozen or so kids of different ethnicities. The Brady Bunch and the politics of race do not mix, though that episode was one of the few times any people of color were on the show, so I guess it deserves props for that. What was I talking about?

Oh right, the circus. Anyway, Ken Berry channels his inner Willy Wonka and tells the kids to “keep up with London.” One of the kids, probably Willie, asks if his last name is “Bridges”. No, he’s like Prince, Madonna, or Cher (if she could turn back time, that is) and goes by just London. Laura asks “London, England or London, Ontario?” I don’t understand the question, but he dismisses it with a “neither one.” He then goes on to describe his creation myth where he sprung fully formed from Emmitt Kelly’s head on some random hillside. Laura then asks how much they can earn. Her questions are really coming out of nowhere today. He answers that “to all of those who pitch in and do their darndest: a freshly washed, unbelievably shiny nickel.” The kids “ooh” and “aah” at this. London’s also going to throw in a ticket to the show. Hmm, his inner Wonka does not seem bent on annihilating these children. Boring.

London leads the drove of kids to the circus tent where they get set to work. After a few of the tasks are completed, London compliments them on how hard they are working. He says he’ll send a good word to Mr. Oleson, causing Willie to brownnose that he can tell his Pa for London. London asks Willie to tell Nels that he won’t be able to make it into town for the circus parade but that he will see him later with a few good words about his “progeny”. Willie says he’ll deliver the message then asks Laura what “progeny” means. “It’s you,” she tells him. He surmises that if it is about him, it can’t be good.

Send in the sad clowns. The town is lined up along the central dirt patch in town to watch the circus parade. There’s a band, a clown on stilts, an elephant, a fat lady, the whole magilla. There’s a shot of Harriet overjoyed as she points at a unicyclist in the distance. Nels walks over to the sad clown/grand marshal and welcomes him to Walnut Grove. He asks where London is and the clown pantomimes that he went off drinking and then stumbled off for a nap. The crowd gets a kick out of this, but Nels is a bit confused. Don’t be a fuddy duddy, Oleson. Nels tells the clown to spread the word that there’s a huge spread over at the restaurant for the circus to enjoy. Harriet then points out the fat lady and makes some sort of snide remark, en Francais. Nels glances over and a look of horror crosses his face. Harriet makes a few more classless comments as Nels runs into the Mercantile.

We rejoin Nels as he sits on his bed. Harriet enters the room to check her makeup and asks her husband what’s wrong. He tries to parry the question and is mostly successful as Harriet tells him he should head over to the restaurant since the circus people will be there. Nels claims to have stomach trouble, but Harriet tells him it’s just nerves as she adjusts her dress in the mirror. Harriet looks over and sees that Nels doesn’t even have his tie tied and she gives him a pep talk as she fixes him up. She finishes the talk by reminding him of how much money is at stake. You know, it was a nice moment those two were having before her miserly ways kicked back in. She mentions that there were dozens of people who haven’t been in the Mercantile in ages, causing Nels to suggest that maybe he should work at the store during lunch. He’s deflecting for some reason, but I don’t think it’s “clownophobia”.

Billy Barty escorts the large lady into the restaurant. Nels is hiding out in the kitchen while Caroline loads the plates for service. Laura enters and announces that the sad clown from earlier has arrived. She’s loading up a plate as she talks about how the clown can’t talk in real life. Caroline muses about how he has made the most of his situation as she watches Laura pile scoop after scoop of mashed potatoes onto the plate. Laura says it is for the fat lady. Contrary to popular belief, not all fat people are eating machines, Laura. Caroline suggests that Laura serve a normal helping and that seconds are available if anybody wants them. Nels sheepishly announces that he should go into the dining room. What has him so skittish?

Nels enters the dining room and the only performer to notice is the fat lady. She tries to say something as Nels walks by but he doesn’t even notice. He is really failing at being a maitre d’ this afternoon. He joins Harriet at the table by the window who asks where he’s been the whole time. He claims to have been supervising the kitchen to make sure everything is hunky-dory. Willie walks by with a plate of food. He explains to his mother that it is a tall order. Huh? The fat lady (is she Annabelle? I really don’t want to keep calling her “fat lady”) looks over at the Olesons’ table and appears to give Harriet the evil eye. Harriet makes a starving elephant comparison and Nels decides that he forgot something at the store. The fat lady watches him leave the restaurant. Meanwhile, Willie’s working the upstairs drive-thru and hands the plate to the clown on stilts. Oh, “tall order”. Ha.