Sylvia 6/10

1981 – Albert secretly plans to marry Sylvia to prevent her father from taking her to another state.

Part Two of this episode starts out in front of the school. Albert drops off his stuff at the base of the steps and says hi to Marcy. She takes one look at him then runs off. Before he can start moping about his lack of luck with the ladies, Laura comes out and asks her brother to come inside. “What’s going on with everybody?” Albert asks. Laura breaks the news that Willie has been talking. Surprise! Mrs. Oleson listened in on Doc Baker’s phone call with Mr. Webb. Now word is traveling around that Albert is the father. Even they are surprised that Mrs. Oleson would stoop that low. Albert grits his teeth saying “If they want to believe it, they can believe it,” and he storms out of the school. Not the best exit line, but at least I’m getting his vibe.

Laura chases after Albert but he asks her to let him go. She agrees and he walks over to where Willie is chatting with some other boys. “You’ve been saying stuff about me,” Albert says. “Only the truth,” Willie replies, “my mother told me.” “Lord knows your mother wouldn’t lie,” Albert sneers. “So it’s true about you and trampy Sylvia?” Willie asks to the laughter of those gathered. “Yes it’s true, and she’s not a tramp.” Albert then slugs Willie across the face, again. I’m not going to lie; I do find those punches to be strangely cathartic. Anyway, Albert runs off while Willie complains about his bloody nose.

We catch up with Ma and Pa at the homestead after Albert has gone to bed. They are pretty shocked about the day’s events and that people can be so cruel. I find that to be a tad naïve. I mean, they’ve lived in Walnut Grove for how many years now and they still don’t know how horrible Mrs. Oleson can be? You may not approve of her behavior, I certainly don’t, but she is pretty consistent and shock no longer seems like an appropriate response. Back to the story, Albert told Pa that he didn’t want to go to school anymore. Ma doesn’t really like the sound of home schooling, but Pa says it would only be temporary. She agrees then she starts talking about what she would like to do to Mrs. Oleson. Now we're talking. Pa is the only one who seems to be naïve in this situation. Good for you, Caroline. She decides to go for a walk to calm down.

The next day we see Sylvia walking past the well at her house. Oh dear, this is all shot from the perspective of someone watching her from a shack or a barn and it is obvious that she doesn’t see the watcher. She goes to the barrels alongside the building and whoever is watching is walking up to her. Sylvia is completely oblivious to the fact that someone is approaching. A hand reaches out and touches her shoulder. “No!” she cries and she runs away. Albert is there and calls out to her as she runs off. Asshole. Not Albert but Michael Landon who wrote this episode. She turns around and sees that it is Albert and not a mime from Hell. Albert tells her it’s alright and she hugs him. “I thought it was him,” she sobs. Albert has no idea who she is referring to, and she tells him about the man in the mask. “Don’t be afraid,” Albert tells her, “I love you.” Aww.

Mrs. Oleson goes into the restaurant all chipper and shrill as if she didn’t destroy the life of some 14 year old girl who has done nothing objectionable. Seriously, Sylvia is nice, the way that oatmeal is nice, and I still cannot wrap my brain around why all the adults in town think she’s the bad seed. Harriet goes into the kitchen where Caroline is kneading some dough. Willie told his mom what happened and Harriet wanted to offer the most insincere apology possible to Caroline. How considerate. “He was only repeating what he heard from his mother,” Caroline seethes as she works the dough. Harriet objects to the implicit accusation. “I never ever called that girl a tramp,” claims Mrs. Oleson. I don’t doubt that; I think she used far more offensive terminology. Caroline cuts off Harriet: “All you did was listen in on a private telephone conversation, add a few lies of your own, and spread it all over Hiro Township.” Mrs. Oleson is pretty steamed at this point and aggressively goes through a sack of baby clothes she brought over for Sylvia. “We don’t need your charity,” Caroline states. “Don’t be ridiculous!” Harriet snaps. Caroline stops kneading and asks her to leave. Instead of reading the room, Harriet decides to go into a self-righteous rant about how Caroline will be that baby’s grandmother. Caroline’s response: slapping the dough smack dab in the middle of Mrs. Oleson’s hateful face. Dude! Awesome! Ten points! Caroline walks out, telling Nellie she’ll be back in an hour and that Harriet better be gone. I think she’s going to get a tattoo or something else equally badass.

Albert and Sylvia are sitting on a log in the woods. Albert doesn’t understand why Mr. Webb hates him or how he can blame Sylvia for what happened. Sylvia wishes she could run away and be with Albert. Albert kisses her and you can see that some wheels are turning in his mind. Sylvia says she needs to go but agrees to meet up with Albert the next day. They exchange “I love yous” and finalize their meeting plans.

Sylvia is working the stove as her father shows Mr. Hartwig the house. The price is 1500 (man, he got hit hard by the housing crisis) and Hartwig wants some time to think about it. Webb is eager to sell, so he tells Hartwig that if another offer comes up he is going to take it. “Again,” Hartwig says, “I’m sorry that you have to go.” He says goodbye. Mr. Webb washes up and notices mud on Sylvia’s shoes. He asks if she went somewhere today and Sylvia lies that she was home all day. He points out the mud and she says she just took a walk. “Don’t you lie to me,” he bellows as he grabs his pregnant daughter by the throat. “If I see you with anyone I’ll kill ‘em, you understand?” Sylvia nods, still in her father’s grip.

“I’m gonna ask you a question and you give me an honest answer,” asks Pa of Albert. Geez, there is a lot going on in this first act. Pa wants to know if Albert is seeing Sylvia. Albert says he has and Pa asks about the wisdom of that choice. Albert thinks he’s in the right and that everyone else can suck it, but he states that more in the way a kid his age would back in those days – politely. He tells Pa that he loves Sylvia, to which Pa responds “Do you think you’re old enough to know what love is?” Albert says yes, since he loves his Pa. Whoa. Not the same thing, kiddo. At least, it better not be. They say good night and go to bed. Separately.